Tag Archives: relationships

What Keeps Us From Forgiving?

Nelson Mandela once said, “Resentment is like taking poison and then hoping your enemies will die.” This, from a man whose enemies imprisoned him for a good share of his life. If ever a person had the opportunity to learn about resentment and forgiveness, he did. And, apparently he learned that hatred, bitterness and harboring [...]

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A Recipe for Making LOVE Last

Ingredients: Listen deeply Open-up: Take the risk to reveal your tender places. Be vulnerable. Validate: You may not agree, but you can search for what makes sense from your partner’s point of view. Evolve: Invest in your own growth, development and self-care. When we feel good about ourselves we are better partners. Directions: Sift 2 [...]

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Interdependency: The Key to a Successful Love Relationship – Part 2

When we are in conflict with our spouse or partner there is almost always something else going on underneath the anger and the details of the argument. We are not fighting about the kids or the laundry or the dirty socks on the floor, although these can easily be the catalyst for our rage. No, [...]

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Interdependency: The Key to a Successful Love Relationship

Our culture is steeped in the idea that to be successful in love we must be independent and strong. Neediness can be seen as a dirty word, and relying on our partner is often considered weak or co-dependent. But what if reliance on our mate is exactly what evolution has primed us for? What if [...]

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Find a Counselor That is Right for You

• Look for a good fit. Many practitioners offer a free 30 minute consultation. Take advantage of this by setting up appointments with two or three different therapists. Meet and talk with them about their approach to counseling and typical length of treatment for your situation. What is their training and experience? What are their [...]

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Why Go to Counseling?

Many people think that you have to be “crazy” or extremely dysfunctional to seek out the services of a mental health counselor. The truth is that most people can benefit. Here are some of the best reasons to see a counselor: • Manage anxiety. Everyone experiences stress and anxiety. In therapy you can learn ways [...]

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Do You Have to Be Crazy to See a Counselor?

Many people think that you have to be “crazy” or extremely dysfunctional to seek out the services of a mental health counselor. The truth is that most people can benefit. Here are some of the best reasons to see a counselor • Manage anxiety. Everyone experiences stress and anxiety. In therapy you can learn ways [...]

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Listening Skills for the Brave and Passionate: Taking it to the Next Level

The last few blog posts have been all about listening; what gets in the way, why listening is important and how listening well can enhance our relationships. So, if you have read and practiced the skills presented so far, now is your chance to take it to the next level by learning the components of [...]

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Listen Like You Mean it!

There is almost nothing better than when someone really listens to us and we get the sense that they understand exactly what we are saying and how we feel about it. The following skills will help you become a better listener and if you practice them, improve your relationships. How to Listen Well: Stop talking. [...]

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“What Most People Really Need is a Good Listening to…” Mary Lou Casey

Listening deeply is a skill that can improve our lives and relationships in profound ways. But most of us just don’t know how to do it. We don’t know how to communicate that we understand, not just the nuts and bolts of what is being said, but also the feelings and needs of the speaker. [...]

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  • About The Author

    Lois Schlegel

    Lois Schlegel, MFA, MS, mental health therapist at Life in Bloom Counseling in Medford and Ashland, has 20 years of experience providing services to individuals and families. She has taught parent education and life skills classes to adults and ... Full Profile
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