HAIKU MONDAY: On Failed Rain Dances, Haiku Poaching and New Moves

Welcome back to Haiku Monday, where Fish Hack is back at the Fish Wrap trying to figure out how to get some water in these-here rivers now that naked rain dancing has failed to produce anything but a few misdemeanor arrests and some gawd-aweful Facebook posts.

Twerkin’ in the rain/Failed to bring water, steelhead./Plan B involves clothes.

For you few Haiku Monday virgins out there, this is when and where Fish Hack waxes on and off non-Brazilian style about the outdoors, with some bad forms of old Japanese poetry thrown in as the schtick.

The schtick has stuck so long that it’s even getting emulated.

Here’s a Seattle Times story about an oceanographer who has distilled climate change into a series of — what else — haikus.

Check it out HERE.

Poaching Fish Hack’s schtick:/Sure hasn’t happened before/Doubt it will again.

Last week’s rains fell far short of what the Natural Resources Conservation Service expected, in terms of what it forecast for streamflows.

Despite all the expectations and hoopla, actual river flows came in at less than half of the forecasts. That sent steelhead bums nothing better to do than go back into the garage to bag empties.

With no new worth-while rains in sight for another week, Hack has shelved the Rain Twerk but needs a new dance that will open the skies, swell the rivers and get winter steelhead up and where they need to be.

Need a new rain dance/One that won’t lead to arrests/But will bring results.  

 

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  • Blog Author

    Mark Freeman

    I've underachieved as the Mail Tribune's Fish Hack since 1989. I can't help but find a few things to yuk about with pathetic regularity in the outdoors. My most treasured award? An OSHA citation for a messy desk -- Fire hazard. YEAH! Read Full
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