HAIKU MONDAY: On French-Kissing Steelhead, Yarn Balls and Eggs

Welcome back to Haiku Monday, where Fish Hack finally got that other form of March Madness out of the way without having to rely on Mercer to win and the Shockers to tap out.

Got that March steelhead caught Sunday on the upper Rogue River, Hack’s home waters.

That’s 10 straight months of catching at least one steelhead on those hallowed home waters. 

French kiss that yarn ball/Steelhead takes bait, streak alive./Ten down, two to go.

For you few Haiku Monday virgins out there, this is when and where Fish Hack waxes on and off non-Brazilian style about the outdoors and whatever the hell else comes to mind, with a few forms of bad Japanese poetry sprinkled in as the schtick.

And don’t poach the schtick./Bloggers, find your own dumb tricks/Not “Haiku Tuesday.”

While other online dopes are munching on their March Madness brackets, let’s just say Fish Hack still has his Final Four intact. That egg on the cheeks of pundits who picked Creighton and Duke is starting to smell much like Fish Hack’s bait fridge.

Picking the Final Four is easier than figuring out how to get those last two months of a steelheader’s year filled while fishing strictly on the company’s dime.

Remember, Fish Hack has caught a steelhead on his home waters every month since June. Catching steelhead year-round in Hack’s back yard is why I’m in my 26th year underachieving at this-here Fish Wrap.

The fact that Hack’s virtually unemployable elsewhere is true, but irrelevant.

Because one man’s hiring freeze is another man’s job security.

Can’t fire Fish Hack/If you can’t replace the dude./Jobbing the job? Course.

Figure on a late-run winter steelhead in early April, and an early-run summer steelhead in late May.

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  • Blog Author

    Mark Freeman

    I've underachieved as the Mail Tribune's Fish Hack since 1989. I can't help but find a few things to yuk about with pathetic regularity in the outdoors. My most treasured award? An OSHA citation for a messy desk -- Fire hazard. YEAH! Read Full
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